If you’ve taken classes, or explored the many websites dealing with Alzheimer’s, you are no doubt familiar with the fact that incontinence of both urine and stool are common. Generally, incontinence of urine occurs earlier in the disease than incontinence of stool.
However, like most all the components of Alzheimer’s, there is no set timetable. So understanding that anything can happen at any time with the one for whom you are caring, is important.
Yet we’re so used to having things be predictable, sometimes that has to be learned the hard way!
That was certainly the case with me.
“Shit happened” fairly early in the disease process, with Ron. There had been no indication of his inability to realize that he had to go to the bathroom, nor any close calls, until one Sunday when his son, Tom, took him out for breakfast. I was looking forward to having some time to myself that morning.
They had only been gone a little over an hour when Tom called. He said they were already on their way home, as, after breakfast when they were walking around the park, his dad pooped in his pants.
I was grateful to have learned of that possibility in the classes I had been taking, and to have at least gotten some medical gloves so I would be prepared, should it happen. After they got home, Tom and I worked together to clean up the mess and helped Ron with a shower, though he didn’t seem to be phased.
To my surprise, a few weeks later I needed to use the gloves again. This time when Ron was incontinent of stool, he was taking a shower. That incident really put me to the test, as I was by myself to clean it up, and believe me, it was a mess!
Since it was relatively early in Ron’s disease versus being in the Late Stage when incontinence of stool is more likely to occur, I was hesitant to have him start wearing Depends. I wanted to be respectful and honor his independence as long as I could. So his other caregivers and I kept a close eye on him and were able to identify if he was restless or demonstrated other signs that he may have to go to the bathroom. We were successful most of the time.
It was only after he became incontinent of urine on a regular basis, that I started using the Depends. After the first two incidents that I described above, it was a gradual process until he was totally incontinent of stool, so we still tried to help him to the bathroom as often as we could. Though it surprised me when that happened so early in Ron’s disease, at least I was aware it could occur with a person who had Alzheimer’s. I was glad I knew about that possibility.
And come to find out, many of the folks from my support group were experiencing it with their spouses as well. In fact, we laughed when we would call each other to get support or share ideas about dealing with shit!
